It has been quite a while since my last blog post, more than 3 months, actually. It was not my intention to wait that long to write. I got busy with exams and work, and to be honest, I’ve been in a deep healing process for quite some time, that went extra deep in the past few months, and so things have been a bit challenging overall.
I finally resumed working on my album this week, though, and am very happy to be back at it! That also took a little longer than planned, but I needed some time to rest and recover after my finals were through in June. The exam period was very stressful, but despite personal and work challenges, I pulled through and it really went even better than expected. It feels really good to be done with it, and I’m glad to have some time off school now until next year. I worked all throughout July, but now in August, I’ve been able to take a little time off, and will focus most of that time productively on my music (except for a little trip to Egypt at the end of the month).
I was able to complete all the lyrics to my songs throughout July (except for a new song that I was inspired to write in the last couple of days). So now that August is here, I have finally started the production work. I frankly was a bit nervous before getting started, as I have not really ever produced before. A few years back when I attempted to start producing my own music, I felt completely overwhelmed by the whole idea, and since then I basically told myself that it wasn’t for me. But last year, as my creative juices started flowing and I began writing songs again, I found that I wanted to have another crack at it.
Despite wanting to produce this album myself, I still reached out to a couple of people to see if they might be able to help me. I guess I still didn’t completely trust that I could do it on my own. But when I didn’t hear back from them right away, I realized that I really need to just get things going by myself. I have to trust that I have the ability to do it. Even if it may take a few trials and errors, and of course that is to be expected. Sometimes the hardest part is just getting started, overcoming the fear and the idea that you don’t have what it takes. So although it felt a bit daunting to do this by myself, I realized in the end that deep down that is what I want and need for myself. Now I’m actually glad that it happened that way, because it forced me to step into my own power, so to speak, and just do it.
Once I finally got going with the production, though, I found that it wasn’t as hard as I thought, and so far I’ve been able to do a lot more than I expected. Of course, some aspects are more challenging than others, but I also realized that I have people I can call on for help that I hadn’t thought of before. Sometimes our fear of something may hold us back from even trying, but once we get going we find that a lot of that fear is unfounded. Fear makes things seem more difficult than they are, but it’s such a victory when we can overcome that fear, and do it anyway!
At the same time as I was getting ready to work on my album, I also bought an online vocal program that I’ve been looking into for a while. Although I’ve been developing my own vocal practice over the past few months, I’ve been feeling that something has been missing, and I hoped that this program would help. I find that it has already, just from the first session. One thing I really like about the program and the person who teaches it, is that much of what he teaches doesn’t only apply to the voice, but to life in general. A lot of it comes down to trusting your abilities and not getting in your own way. That is as true for singing as it is for music production, and many other things in life.
My take away for this week, then, is to let go and trust that everything will fall into place. Even if things don’t always end up the way you expect, doesn’t mean that they end up bad. Sometimes the outcome may even exceed your expectations! As long as we just dare to take that first step, and continue to be committed to the process, everything else will work itself out. That is my experience, anyway.
With that I send you much love & light,